Author Comment:
Any guesses as to what that contraption might be? The cleverest and/or funniest guess will be awarded naming rights.
So, it’s a week later, and here are the results:
There were too many great suggestions to pick a single winner:
- Future Marketing Award:
alurker for the Miracle Fat Blaster 2000™ - Weaponized Beverage Award:
BowenTheKotoc for the Auto Long Range Tea Dispenser (ALRTD) with Dual Nozzles - Stating The Obvious Award:
Parnifia the Bastard - Dead-On Accuracy Award & Fart Joke Award:
W. Murphy for a pressure assisted speaking tube - Catchy Title Award:
mjarndt for the Double-Barreled Tea Trumpet. - WTF Award:
davidbreslin101 for inflating flying pigs? - Cringe-Worthiest Award:
LockeZ for his rudimentary mammogram device - Overwrought Epethet Award:
CapnPanda for VATTHEHELL - Most-Adorable Award:
Bob Kerns for the little teapot, short, with spouts. - Cop-Out Winner-Picker Award: Mvandinter 😉
Wait – I think I saw one of those on the home shopping channel.
Is it a Miracle Fat Blaster 2000 ™ ?
Wow! The audience for Unearth has penetrated the Home Shopping Channel demographic! That’s a good sign, right?
I’m guessing it’s an Auto Long Range Tea Dispenser (ALRTD) with Dual Nozzles.
Ooooo. That certainly conjures a vivid mental image… of screaming tea-drinkers dodging burning jets of their favorite beverage 🙂
I think it looks like it’s just meant to send messages.
…Through the air.
…At high speed…
Is it a cell phone?
Yes. That would be a primitive cell phone.
It’s a pressure assisted speaking tube! You talk into the mouth piece while the bellows are pumped and the added force carries the sound farther. Hopefully the wind coming out of the other end doesn’t break the sound barrier. Though wind maybe broken.
Finally! Someone made a fart joke! I’ve been waiting 49 weeks for that! Thank you, Sir 🙂
It’s a double-barreled tea trumpet.
Now that’s a catchy title 🙂
It’s a device for inflating pigs, to make them capable of unpowered flight. You can tell by the snout-shaped nozzles. (There’s two of them because who has time to inflate a herd of swine one at a time?)
Mmmm… I like your thoughtful, scientific hypothesis. Now how do we go about testing it’s validity? 😉
I believe it is a rudimentary mammogram device.
Ah, oh, um… (holds head in hands and slowly moans)
It must be…
The Voice Amplifying Through The Heat Engaging Hoarse Evading Luster Lube.
Or, VATTHEHELL for short.
If there was a prize for tongue-twister with a punchline, you’d own it 🙂
A little teapot, short, with spouts.
Now I’ve got that song stuck in my head. Thanks :-p
Stating the obvious; it’s what Parnifia the Bastard does best.
(Besides talking in the third person.
OK, but where does the ‘bastard’ part come in?
Clearly it’s a baby Dalek. Any moment now, it will start yelling, “COMMUNICATE!!! COMMUNICATE!!” and waving its dual plungers around. (It has two plungers, like all juvenile Daleks do until their first moulting.)